24 hours

24 hours from now, I will be almost done defending my dissertation.  Thank god. (Of course then there will be revisions and filing, but hey, one major step will be behind me.)

We kept Dyls home from daycare again today.  This is despite the fact that she didn't have a temperature this morning and seemed fine at first.  At about 8 she got all scream-y and meltdown-y, and I decided that she probably still wasn't feeling 100% herself, and would do better if she stayed home.

However, I had to leave the house because I need to practice my presentation! So I left [au pair] at home to tend her.  I think she will do fine.

Did I mention?  My office flooded yesterday so I have no place to go practice my dissertation.  Well that's not really true, there is a space that I can use that mom's sometimes go to pump, but when I went there I got booted out by a nursing mom 15 minutes after I sat down (which I understand and am obviously sympathetic too, but still).  So it's almost 11 and I still haven't been able to get anything done.

I really need to practice, guys!

I won't even get into the logistics for tomorrow.  Suffice to say that nobody in my family seems capable of using the internet to look up directions besides me, or even remotely capable of planning, well, anything.  Everyone expects me to just take care of everything.  And if I don't my husband will have a meltdown and my father will give me a lecture about how inconsiderate and selfish I am.

You know what?  I refuse to do this.  Someone else is just going to have to figure out how to get Dylan to daycare and my parents and husband to my defense because I just don't have the time or the mental energy to do this right now.  I need to make sure that *I* am ready.  I shouldn't have to pick up everyone elses' slack tomorrow morning also.

I guess there are two silver linings to all of this:
1. Because Dylan has been home with [au pair] this week, she has gotten used to her, and seems to enjoy playing with her now.
2. I've gotten to take advantage of the fact that I have this extra help!  I mean, I sort of feel like I am getting punished for some karmic offense from every other angle, but at least [au pair] is awesome and helpful and oh my god thank god we hired her and that she started when she did.

I just hope things start to go more smoothly and we can all settle back into some sort of a routine.  I feel like I'm going crazy trying to get everything done.  I just want to sit here and put my head in my hands, but I can't because there's just too much to do.